I’ve begun re-reading Timothy Keller’s The Meaning of Marriage.
Adam and I read this years ago but now we are in a completely different place in our marriage relationship.
When I first read this book we had not experienced moving across the country twice, job loss(es), job changes, having 5 kids in 2 and a half years, devastating secrets and lies, losing our 3 week old, 2nd born baby girl. We hadn’t experienced hard life together.
We loved each other to be sure. We supported each other. We encouraged each other. But we hadn’t really been challenged in any of those ways. Life was easy.
Now being on the other side of all of those “real life” things this book is hitting me on a deeper level. I almost feel like I’m reading it for the first time.
I haven’t even finished the first chapter but I love the reminder that marriage is suppose to be a union in which two people join together in order to be held accountable, to die to self “in favor of the relationship”.
As believers our marriage union is to be a reflection of the relationship God has with the church. His relationship with the church, as revealed in Scripture, isn’t always an easy one because he is choosing to love sinful people. Our earthly marriage relationships won’t be easy either because we are two sinful humans choosing (striving) to love each other as Christ loves. This daily dying to self for the mutual interest of the relationship (and as a reflection of Christ and the church) as a whole is not without great effort from both parties.
I pray with time and daily practice that it will become easier for Adam and me. Seven years isn’t such a long time to be married but it feels that way at times.